June 06, 2005

Channeling Shirley Temple

I had beautiful hair when I was a kid. It was long, fine, straight as a pin and the color of shiny brass.

And then, everything changed.

It grew darker, thicker and began to wave and kink. It also got big. I mean really big. So big that my hair probably has it's own gravity well. None of this would be a problem except that I have no freaking idea what to do about it. I'm not that kind of girl. I sometimes think that I missed some class on how to be female in school.

I've tried to learn how to dry it, curl it, straighten it, style it or something. But none of it works. I have some natural disinclination towards hair doing. I try to use a curling iron and I end up burned (literally). I try to dry it straight and I end up with one flat side and one giant curl side. What's a girl supposed to do?

So I've decided to just let it be, let my freak flag fly, accept the fact that an evil Shirley Temple has set up shop in my hair and she doesn't want to leave. Besides, I have giant boobs, surely that outweighs my giant hair?

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